Welcome to Issue #64 of Biblia Luna, the weekly newsletter about the intersection of mental illness and faith, written by a pastor who lives with depression. I put the holy back in melancholy! (Should I say “Happy Melancholidays” this week?)
Hopefully Tomorrow – Strange Visions
Christians are getting ready to celebrate Christmas, and so many of us are hearing again the old stories from the gospels of Matthew and Luke, stories that tell of the birth of the one we know as the Messiah. I’m struck this year by how much these stories involve trusting in paranormal events. Take a look:
In Luke 1, a young woman named Mary receives a visit from an angel, who tells her that she is about to become pregnant with the Son of God, despite being a virgin. And she trusts this vision.
In Luke 2, some shepherds out in the fields receive a visit from not just one, but a heavenly host of angels, who tell them that the Savior has been born in the city of David, Bethlehem. And they trust this vision, and go to Bethlehem.
In Matthew 1, Joseph is about to cancel the wedding with his pregnant fiancée, but he has a dream in which an angel tells him not to. He trusts this dream. Joseph later receives other dreams telling him to take his family to Egypt, and then to return from Egypt. He trusts them all.
In Matthew 2, magi from the east see a star in the sky that they interpret as the rise of a new king in Israel. They trust this star.
This stuff seems so normal to so many Christians because we’ve heard these stories our whole lives, and because we believe that it’s good to trust strange visitors, celestial objects, and dreams when they come from God. But in real life, trusting in dreams and in visions others don’t see might be called schizophrenia. Imagine a loved one telling you about experiences like this – you might find yourself dreadfully worried about their mental health. And imagine you yourself having experiences like this – how would you know if it’s from God or not? How would you know if you’re having a religious experience or a psychological breakdown? The best response I can come up with is this: Does this experience bring you hope and life, and offer hope and life for others? If it does, then I’d entertain the possibility that it’s from God. If not, if it provides fear or anger, or calls for treating yourself or others poorly, then I’d be much more skeptical that God is involved. I am convinced that God is a God of love, and hope, and compassion, and grace. And that’s a good measuring stick to measure any strange experience by, I think, paranormal or not. If something in your day brings you hope and life, then just maybe it’s a gift, a message, from God.
Hopefully.
A Question about Birthdays
In the past few years, I have grown to really dislike my birthday. It’s strange, I always used to enjoy it. But now, I find myself wanting to be left alone on my birthday. I get cranky when I get “Happy Birthday” emails from businesses, even if they come with discounts or coupons. I don’t want presents, I don’t want cards, I don’t want cake, I don’t want to be sung to. I just want it to be a normal day. I find it so strange to be feted just because I survived one more trip around the sun. I find it remarkable how hard it is to avoid well-meaning people wishing me a special day, even if I tell them I don’t like my birthday. I don’t know – maybe it’s just depression talking, maybe it’s my Dark Voice telling me that I don’t deserve recognition. But there’s also a part of me that thinks maybe people should be allowed not to celebrate their birthdays if they don’t want to. So I’m wondering – am I the only person like this? Does anybody else feel this way about their birthdays? And if so what do you do about it?
Over on the Blog…
Scholtes-Blog has been quite busy, as I continue to write my daily Advent Blog posts. It’s been so good to get back in the habit of writing. Once Advent is done, I’m going to have to come up with something else to focus on each day!
Some Resources from Very Well Mind
As a Neurodivergent Therapist, the Holidays Can Feel Overwhelming—Here's How I Cope
Dealing With Loneliness During the Holiday Season
5 Ways to Manage Your Mental Health During the Holidays, According to a Therapist
What Are the Post-Holiday Blues?
Biblia Blessing
The people who walked in darkness have seen a great light;
those who lived in a land of deep darkness—on them light has shined.
(Isaiah 9:2, New Revised Standard Version, Updated Edition)